Baking with Igor and the Professor

Hi. My name is Igor. I know what you are thinking. Igor is such lame name for a laboratory assistant. I wanted to be called Paul. Paul is much nicer. It has a sophisticated ring to it. I like Paul very much. But my parents decided that Igor it is. It didn’t help much that I have a bit of a hump. Not much to worry about, you hardly notice it. But the kids at school called me Quasi. I don’t look anything like Quasimodo who lives in Paris. Even though he is my third degree cousin.

Today is Wednesday, baking day. I’m not a big fan of baking. It’s boring. It starts first thing in the morning. The Professor gets up early and there is chaos in the castle before the sun even is up. This is so annoying. The rooster is most confused about the commotion. It’s the only day when he stays indoors until lunchtime.

The Professor is in the kitchen early on Wednesday, baking day. He screams a lot. He yells at me and wants to know this is and where that went. It’s always at the same spot. Here are the pots and there is the flour. Batteries and jumper leads are in the basement. It never changes. It’s such a a drag. The professor likes the control. He never has control. He has a lot of out-of-control. I mean, seriously, he wants to bake a bread or a cake by hooking up jumper leads to the dough to make it raise faster. Sometimes I think he requires a few jumpstarts.

So here we are again in the kitchen, baking. The professor is running around with flour, yeast, water, sugar and all sorts of bowls and kitchen utensils. He’s shouting and uuuuhing and aaaaahing all the time. Then I have to bring him the battery. I don’t know what he is on about this battery thing. It never works. But hey, it makes him happy and that is all it matters. He clamps the jumper leads onto the bowl and his mood changes. He has a light installed under the kitchen bench. It gives him an added feel of drama. “Igooooor, Give me pooooower!!!” Yes master. You got that right, yes master is what I have to say. I tried something different once; “Jawohl Herr Kommandant”. Oh boy. You should have seen the result. The flower can still be found everywhere. I’m still cleaning. Needless to say that I won’t use that again. It’s back to boring old ‘Yes master’.

Well, the battery is hooked up and the professor is all worked up. This time he will succeed. Let me tell you this; it will be a success if he only turns the oven down a bit. the bread went into the oven at 380 degrees for four hours. Just as well the castle is made of stone. It would have burnt to the ground by now.  Can you guess who has to clean it all up again? Yes? Of course. Poor Igor cleans it all up  again.

I hate baking

The end

SHARE IT: